47 Things I’ve Learned in 47 Years


My friend Miki Young died last year but has been oh-so-present in my mind and heart lately. When I once asked her how we can add to the Love in the world, she answered, “Well, I think we’re supposed to live, learn and share.”

I’ve lived 47 years today. And for my birthday I decided to share a few things I’ve learned… so far.


  1. My thoughts are powerful – for better or worse.
  2. My thoughts are sometimes untrue… stories that were created in the mind.
  3. My life now is reflective of what I have thought, said and done in the past.
  4. Right now I am creating my future experiences with my thoughts, words and actions.
  5. My experience is colored by my perception.
  6. It’s helpful to have a “homing” thought – something positive that I believe that I can grasp onto, remember and think about in the tough times.
  7. Letting go of my story and dropping into the present moment opens me up to happiness, wisdom, and better ideas.
  8. Healing with my mind is possible at levels that I am not capable of yet.



  1. Never mud wrestle with a pig – you both get dirty and the pig likes it (referring to arguing, for example, with an active alcoholic about their drinking).
  2. Don’ t go to an empty well for a drink of water… or to a hardware store for a loaf of bread.
  3. I am responsible for my own happiness.
  4. My loved ones have a Higher Power – and it’s not me.
  5. God is smarter than me after all.
  6. Acceptance is the answer to almost every problem. (And then I can take action if I choose to.)



  1. My body responds in kind to me being kind to it.
  2. What I can do is mostly limited by my ability to conceive of it and believe it.
  3. Laughter is healing.
  4. Food can be powerful medicine.
  5. There is an unlimited well of love within me.
  6. I have access to ideas, answers, solutions and wisdom that is beyond my small brain and mind.
  7. Inside my body is a doorway to Peace/Grace/Knowing/God.



  1. I can end an argument by dropping into my heart and having the courage to express what is really going on for me.
  2. My partner is not here to meet my needs.
  3. The purpose of my intimate relationship is for me to give love, to realize the unlimited love that is my core.
  4. What is not love is a call for love.
  5. The faults I find in others are for me to look at in myself and learn.
  6. My partner does not want me as his therapist.
  7. No one likes to be told what to do.
  8. The opposite of love is judgment.
  9. A sense of humor is essential.



  1. There is a place within me from which I can see the play of this life go on. When I am connected there the next right thing to do is obvious.
  2. When everything feels like it is falling apart is when everything is falling into place.
  3. In this moment all is well. (And I can create change.)
  4. Doing what is truly best for me, in my heart, is best for the world.
  5. Nothing is a failure if I learned something.
  6. I only have to trust myself and the Universe.
  7. Nothing remains unchanged by love.
  8. There is no “other” or “them”.
  9. I am happier without “should” in my vocabulary.
  10. Asking for help provides someone else an opportunity to give.



  1. No one religion (or political party, group, system, tradition or person, for that matter) has it ALL right.
  2. I have unseen helpers – who may be angels, spirit guides, ancestors and/or dead relatives and friends.
  3. “We’re all just walking each other home.” (borrowed that one from Ram Dass)
  4. Once I cross the river I don’t need to drag the raft around with me.
  5. The power of love and energy is multiplied with group intention.
  6. Peace in the world begins with peace in my heart – and from there right action can come.
  1. I don’t know anything for sure. I want to stay open to learning.










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