I don’t think the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. I think it may be paved with Shadow Intentions though.

Let me define, first Hell:

The loss of knowledge of our True Selves, without Realization of Our Oneness with All That Is, suffering created by the mind, feeling that all is lost or futile or that You are worthless.

And now Shadow Intention:

Something you are unknowingly trying to create or maintain in your life, that in your right mind or if you knew about it you would never be trying to manifest. They come from old tapes running in our minds, old trauma, ways that had once served us, society, etc.

My friend/Wise Woman/Shaman/Interfaith Minister/Golden Mirror, Riva and I have been intending in joined force for a couple of months now, to love our bodies and our selves into perfect Harmony. The Magic happening is being funneled and formed into a small group experience that I (and maybe We, can she be persuaded) will be offering to You soon-ish.

Today she texted me her intention along with a “Shadow Intention” that came to her awareness. Holy Cows and Chickens! I may have one of those too! (Just one if I’m lucky.) It jumped out at me soon after.

I intend to not shine too brightly, not to be TOO noticed or sparkly, or BIG, or loud, or controversial, or Altogether Fabulous. Just TONE IT DOWN!

Origins of this Shadow Intention are varied and vast – from unwanted male attention, to Catholic doctrine, to embarrassing moments. All of which are almost immaterial now that it has been dowsed in Light. It shall not survive. The past year there seems to be a theme in my life – messages (intuitive and otherwise) saying Be Bold, Big, Loud and Fabulous, open to Your Gifts and give them to the World. Such is my intention, and without a Shadow holding it back it shall Be.

Do you feel stuck in some area of your life, even though you are intending to change it, move forward or create something different?

What Shadow Intention may be pulling you in the opposite direction and causing the standstill?

“How can we add to the Love in the world?”

The answers were varied and gorgeous and True. And yet I felt like there were two answers in essence:

1. Go within and connect.

2. See our connectedness in the world.

I am down with that. So down. My efforts go there. My allegiance is there.

And into my head popped:

Where does your allegiance lie? Who or what are you dedicated to?

Reading that, I remembered my aversion to What to Expect When You’re Expecting when I was pregnant. I specifically requested that no one buy it for me or pass it on to me. Could be just the title rubs me wrong, I know. I didn’t want to be told what to expect. I wanted to have my own experience, be open to all possibilities and be present with each moment.

When I was in graduate school and had joints so swollen that I couldn’t bend my knees, the prestigious medical center at the university came only to the conclusion (after many tests, inspections and injections) that I had arthritis. They gave me anti-inflammitories, told me to lay off teaching aerobics and referred me to a rheumatoid specialist. I rebelled, then juiced, rested and healed. I like doctors. I go to doctors. I just know there is More.

Be a bit of a rebel.

What if common outcomes, results and realities are, in part, mass agreements we have made?… Beliefs that we have solidified by validating them time and again as a society. 

Could be good news! It could just mean that to examine what we expect and question what we believe can open us to… to… WHO KNOWS?!

Here’s what that inspired:

What’s your Giant Squid?

When I officiate a wedding I usually start with a moment of silence. I guide everyone to become present in the moment, to offer their Presence as a gift to the couple. We acknowledge those who are not able to be there, those who have passed on, etc.

Next I like to address the couple, with a reading or quote and a bit of my own perspective on love and relationships. It’s a lite version, appropriate, sweet… hopefully hopeful and uplifting.

If I could have an Ally McBeal moment (in case you’re too young, that show would feature way-out scenes in the midst of the action showing Ally’s real thoughts or what she really wanted to say and then snap back to the ordinary conversation)… Here’s what I would say:

My 3 yr. old daughter goes to a preschool that is part of a Methodist church. One day she came home with a little poodle toy that she “won” for knowing the bible verse of the day. I asked her, “What was the bible verse?”

She said very slowly, “Put… on… love.”

Oh. Put on love. Hmm, I don’t remember that one… but I like it!

What if we woke up in the morning and put on Love… like cologne, or socks.

Imagine if you broke your arm, and put Love on it.

Or applied Love to all of your perceived problems.

It reminds me of how I was in my first marriage before discovering Al-Anon. I thought that my husband’s drinking was OUR problem. I told him what to do. I tried to control him, alcoholism, everything. Al-Anon helped me apply Love to the situation… and to the proper place. You can’t heal the wound by putting the salve on the wrong spot, right? You don’t want to operate on the wrong patient! I applied Love to myself first. I practiced taking care of myself and took responsibility for my own safety and happiness. That’s Love. That changed everything in my experience. And then I was capable of being loving toward him too.

I did leave eventually… with Love, for him and myself. So then I was going through a separation and divorce. Applying Love equalled napping, feeding myself well, allowing feelings to have their way as they moved through me, letting friends help me.

And Love showed up, as a reflection of my Love for myself I believe (enter husband #2).

I am working right now on a Journey for women where we apply Love to the perceived problem of our weight, size and body. I am practicing it with a wise friend. We both felt unhappy about our weight creeping up, and not happy with being unhappy about it. We wanted any changes to be made within Love and Compassion for ourselves. It has unleashed Magic.

Do you see anywhere you could apply Love in your life? Do you know precisely where to rub it in?

Here are some directions I found on the bottle:

• Put on Love in the morning. Slather it on your naked body.
• Apply Love liberally to your past. See it. Let go what does not serve you now. Keep the lessons and positive messages.
• Soothe yourself with Love when you are stressed or tired. Consider what would be a really loving thing to do for your body, mind and Spirit. Do it.
• Pour Love all over your relationships. Make sure you get it on yourself too.  (Click to tweet any of these instructions. Share the Love.)
• Abundance issue? Love money. I followed Fabeku‘s suggestion to write Her (money, that is) love letters for a month. (His Teletastic on money is genius. It’s #6.)
• Add Love to the world. Sprinkle generously and often. Love the Earth. Love the Other. Love your Self.

Moon Circle began over a weekend workshop (more of our Love Story is here). As it began, we all piled into a hotel room… and someone let one slip.

Lori Portka declared, “We should be able to fart freely!”

And so it was.

My little daughter feels the same safety when it’s just us girls. If she farts she’ll say, “That’s OK!” But when Daddy is around and points it out, she’ll deny it.

Is there a place where you can be truly yourself, farts and all?

Where you are accepted unconditionally…

Where others see only your beauty…

Where you are surrounded by the knowing of your Inner Knowing – no advice, no expert…

Where you can practice, absorb, and nurture Self-Acceptance ?

I wish this for every woman. It was life-changing for me. Uplifting. Exalting.

If this sounds like something you need, want, crave, secretly wish for or want to try… Stay tuned!

I am creating a space for 7 women interested in journeying together over a Moon Cycle – from one New Moon until the next – in loving support of one another and in service to themselves.

The New Moon Journey is coming soon.

Farting freely is understood.

Don’t worry, Self-Acceptance smells like flowers.

Self-Worth, Self-Acceptance, Self-Confidence, Self-Love, Self-Care…

and the big one, Self-Realization

These words buzz around, don’t they? They sound great.

I think sometimes the problem is that we don’t know the Self. WHO exactly are we accepting, loving, caring for? WHO do we want to have confidence in and trust? WHO is worthy of spending time Realizing?

When we meet that WHO, the rest is kind of a no-brainer.

Who we are beyond the mind, the problems, the busyness, the debt, the weight, the shame, the illness, the loss, the loneliness, the guilt… is Divine. Is Love. Is Freedom. Is Connection. Is Wholeness and Holiness. Is Beautiful.

Couldn’t you love and accept that? Wouldn’t you care for Her? Isn’t He worthy?

Here’s how to meet and get to know Who You Are every day:

• Meditate – It doesn’t have to be for 45 minutes twice a day. Consistency is what is effective. Every day. 5 minutes. Sit there. Breathe. 
• Feel – During a big decision, a joyful moment, a time of despair… feel the sensations in your body. Allow them to wash over and through, and guide and inform you.
• Move – Shake up the energy in the body daily. Walk. Dance. Rebound. Yoga. Boxing. Something.
• Laugh or smile –  Force it if you have to. The mind can be fooled by the body acting joyfully.
• Watch what you say – Especially negative things about yourself that start with “I can’t”, and anything starting with “I should” or “I have to”. Drop em.
• Watch what you think – When you feel you are not at peace, go back a few moments and investigate what thought process led to you losing your peace. Keep thinking that only if you want more misery. Have a homing thought that you can grab on to that brings you back in the right direction.
• List your gratitude – in your mind or on paper. Life Changing.
• Zip up – My teacher Henry Grayson taught me this energy saving technique. All you do is imagine a zipper that goes from your foot, up one leg and then up the center of your body to the top of your head. Grab hold of the imaginary zipper tab and pull it all the way to the top. Done. Great if you are someone who tends to lose themselves around others, in crowds, at family functions… or just before going to meet anyone especially draining on your energy (if you must).

Let’s do it together. April 24th I am guiding 7 women in supporting one another in Mind-Body Healing (in other words, finding who they really are and their inner Magic). We will go over these 8 daily practices, and more importantly do the preliminary work that makes them even easier – the energetic clearing of mental blocks and obstacles. Ready to Soar? Join us.